I was reading about Anthony Robbin’s daughter Jolie’s experience while having breakfast this morning.
Jolie was an aspiring performer and she got a job over 1000s of applicants to perform at Disneyland. It was a huge achievement for a teenager. But after a while she realised that she had to give up a lot for the job. She had less time with her family. It was a hectic schedule. She started getting cranky and depressed even though she had everything she always dreamt of having. Or has she?
Sounds familiar? I thought to myself OMG that’s exactly how I felt for the past few years.
In the end Jolie gave up the job at Disneyland to spend more time with her family. The break gave her time to do what’s most important to her. In the end she got a job with a prominent theatre company. All’s well end’s well.
When I first started working in Birm, a friend said to me ‘You have everything PJ. Everything. You are living the dream.’ Of course I knew that was not entirely true. I had achieved what I set myself to achieve. Yet I felt I had nothing. It has been tough over the past few years. The guilt of not spending enough time with family. The fear of not being able to be there for them when they needed me. The constant feeling that I am missing out on anniversaries, weddings, birthdays, festivities.
We have to make the most of our situation. I started going out and seeing people. Yet I still felt empty. That was when I realised where I am now is not aligned to my values and the things that really mattered to me – my family.
My cuz thinks that my decision would have been different if I had a boyfriend here. I realised that all these years I could never commit myself to anyone here because deep down inside I already knew the decision I was going to make. And love should not stop anyone from pursuing their dreams. And my dream is just to have a simple happy life with my family who have always loved me no matter how messed up things get.
Hence the decision was made to relocate back to Asia to be closer to home end of this year. Mum feels like I am giving up everything. But the truth is I am giving up nothing for everything that mattered to me and everything that is most important to me.
4 comments:
the "empty" feeling. knowing that u have watever ppl are seeking..but still missing "something"..
i think the emptiness comes from not knowing where to go after you have achieved something. i guess its a journey we all have to take to finally reach where we want to be. we all get there eventually. ;-D
catch you in muar yo if you come back for the weekend.
see you at the other side!!! xxx
hey PJ, i totally understand ur feelings.
In the end, it isn't the money, the job or the fame that matters.
It is what makes us happy that matters the most. Nothing in the world can replace what we really love and care for. It's great to know u have such a close knit family. Make the most out of it while you can, after all, we only live once!
Enjoy Muar :)
helo!!
i thought i would be able to catch you at klia yesterday but unfortunately we arrived an hour late.
hope to catch you next time.
have a superawesometastic holiday before term starts again. ;-p
x
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