Currently listening to Maroon 5’s album ‘It Won’t Be Soon Before Long.’ My bro said when he listened to this album he is reminded of me. Apparently this kinda music is totally me. Not sure what he is implying…that I am absolutely cheesy maybe. But before he loaded the song for me I have not heard of any of the songs at all.
Lately I have been thinking a lot about ‘the future’. I seriously have no idea at all where I want to be. My family feels I should work abroad and experience ‘the life’. But sometimes I just wish I could see my family more often. Its tough being away from home and only those who have been away will understand how hard it is. I feel a bit homeless.
Part of me wants to go back but I am getting quite settled here in UK. If I were to go back and if it is tough there, my folks will say ‘We told you so…’ Damn, I hate it when they are right and they always are. Almost always anyway….
It is a morbid thought as well that time is ticking away and life is short. And I want to spend my short life being with my loved ones and not being apart from them. Then my mum will say that perhaps it is better being apart sometimes because being too close will lead to more conflicts and arguments which probably is true. I will probably be sick of my mum urging me to get a boyfriend if I am home all the time.
I really miss mum and dad loads. I always tell my mum I love her when I call home and her reply is always ‘Aiyo, go find a boyfriend to love lah…’
Perhaps it is easier when you have a boyfriend cause you just have to factor him in when making decisions which will reduce all the available options. But I know friends with boyfriends are not having an easy time making decision either. It is all about compromise I guess.
A lot of my friends are surprise when I decided to stay here and work as they all know I am quite a homey person. I love having a quiet weekend just watching TV with my family. I know I am boring. This weekend has been quiet for a change and I just love staying in my duvet reading a book. Currently reading ‘A Thousand Rooms of Dream and Fear’ by Atiq Rahimi. Brilliantly written but quite disturbing.
I apologise as this entry is so badly structure. I am not too sure what I am going on about. Oh my head hurts. I wish I could go back to bed. Its Monday again….
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