Just friends and nothing more. Hmmm...
Have been having conversations about Platonic Friendships (PF). First with Shu then with John. Feels like de ja vu talking to both but the difference is one agrees with me and the other don't.
Firstly let me define PF, ( sounding very academic, reason is that I have been writing loads of essays for the past few weeks.). PF is when a guy and gal are close friends and each knows that they only want to be friends and nothing more. Then there is the question of defining close friends. To me close friends is someone you trust loads and share loads with. But that is up to you to decide. You get what I mean anyway.
I think PF is not feasible in the long run because of the following possibilities:
1. Many many cases, one or the other will start developing special feelings and desire to be more than friends. It is happy ending if it is mutual and if it is not then one person will get very very hurt.
2. Once one or the other have a partner, things change. There will tend to be rivalry or jealousy. It is natural that you would be suspicious if your partner is so buddy buddy with someone of the opposite gender.
3. Refering back to no 2. Not only will there be rivalry, it is just natural that less time will be spent with each other because there will be preference and priority for the partner. Once no 2 happens everything just changes and it will feel like you lost a friend to someone else. ( This may even hold for good friends of the same gender.)
4. Another point for no 2 is less sharing because you know the trust could easily be broken. Most people cannot keep secrets from their partners.
However I am sure in this Big wide world, there must be a few very special PF. I really admire these rare special cases because I am sure it takes a lot more to make it work than normal relationships. I guess relationships and friendships is an ever changing thing. To make it work is by adapting to the changes and move on to a new chapter. Perhaps it is all these uncertainties and change that makes life more exciting.